The Kiss Me Quick's artwork for "Soundscapes" by Jade A. Waters. (Art by Big Daddy Caraway)

The Kiss Me Quick’s Podcast: Soundscapes

Oh, everyone…I’ve been so damn excited to tell you about this, and today is the day!

I’ve been listening to The Kiss Me Quick’s Erotica Podcast for some time now, and I’m forever blown away by what an incredible show it is. Rose Caraway is a fabulous narrator, and the stories she features are always a treat, especially as performed in her deliciously sexy voice!

So, imagine my surprise—and utter delight—when Rose asked if I would be interested in sharing a story with the KMQ. To be clear, there was dancing in my chair and a lot of squealing…and then the absolute pleasure of saying yes.

Or rather, yes yes yes!

Now, the story you’re going to hear over at the KMQ is called “Soundscapes,” and I have to admit that this one has a real-life backstory. Um, kind of…

Fantastic "Soundscapes" podcast art by Big Daddy Caraway!

Fantastic art by Big Daddy Caraway!

See, a couple years ago, I had a short-lived tryst with an extraordinarily bizarre deejay…the tryst was so short, in fact, that not much happened at all. Nonetheless, I went home and had the strangest dream—as I’m apt to do—about a deejay, a woman, and something about him crafting her soundscape. Upon waking, I remembered just enough to roll onto my side, wipe the sweat from my brow (yeah, it was good), and mutter, “Holy shit, that’s grounds for one weird story right there.” I jotted a few notes and put the idea aside, but I had a feeling that one day the dream might morph itself into a full story.

So, take a whole lot of creative license with a semi-incomplete and fantastical dream, mix it with the sensational voice of one talented Miss Rose Caraway, and add the incredible musical choices of Big Daddy, and I am ever so happy to share with you…

The Kiss Me Quick’s podcast of “Soundscapes.”

A giant thank you to Rose for honoring me with this opportunity! I couldn’t be more delighted to hear this story performed so damn well, and now to get to share it with all of you!

I do so hope you enjoy it. 🙂

XX,
Jade

The Pillow Talk...Erotica Writers Talking Dirty logo: black and white image of a cartoon woman with bright red lips on a pillow

Pillow Talk Secrets Launches Today!

Okay, I’ve been hinting, hinting, and more hinting that today was going to be fabulous—and now it’s finally happening! Today marks the launch date for Pillow Talk: Erotica Writers Talking Dirty! 

See, Malin James, Tamsin Flowers, and I—your host for the day, Jade A. Waters—have been telling so many erotic secrets about writing and sex in general behind closed doors, we figured it was time to share it all with you. We formed Pillow Talk for just that—inviting you to listen in on our dirty dish, too. In today’s post we’d like to introduce ourselves as well as share what you can expect from Pillow Talk Secrets. In future sessions, we’ll be posting a short intro and links on our own blogs to direct you to the Pillow Talk website, where the full session will be posted—but in honor of our lift off, today you can read it all right here!

So without further ado, I’d like to welcome you to the first…

Pillow Talk Secrets!

Jade: Good morning, ladies! The day is finally here. Our official Pillow Talk Secrets launch!

Malin: We’ve been so busy at it, it’s kind of hard to believe!

Tamsin: I think it might have crept up on some of us!  So what’s on the agenda, Jade?

J: Well, I figured today we should let our readers know what we’re all about, and then a little about each of us and how we met.

M: Perfect. Who wants to start? Maybe with a bit about what we’re doing?

J: Exactly. What is Pillow Talk? How should we describe ourselves?

T: Starting with the obvious, three writers—of erotica, naturally—similarly dirty minded!

J: Which basically means, dirty dirty dirty talk. Yes?

M: Yes. It’s also probably the biggest reason we became friends in the first place—erotica definitely brought us together.

J: I just smiled when you said that, Malin. It’s true! I still can’t remember who I friended first—it was so fabulous in both directions—but was it you, Tamsin?

Smiling woman jumping in the air with outstretched pom-poms

Jade A. Waters, Resident Cheerleader

T: I think so—we met on Twitter over a discussion of a pair of boots Alison Tyler was lusting after—and you very quickly became my chief cheerleader.

J: Oh, that’s right! I was squealing and dancing all over the place, as I usually do (also, Alison Tyler has some wickedly good taste in shoes!). But I think we got closer once I realized you wrote a zombie erotica book—because I thought that was wild—and then we started emailing….

M: I had no idea you guys started talking over Alison Tyler’s awesome taste in shoes! That’s fabulous…. And then of course, Tamsin’s zombies are…well, let’s just say I’m not a zombie kind of girl, but it’s the sexiest, most inventive set of zombies I’ve ever seen.

T: Ah, I use those zombies to hook all my friends!

J: I knew you were up to something! 🙂 Meanwhile, as Tamsin and I became cohorts…

M: Jade and I met at a reading for The Big Book of Orgasms! It was the first reading either of us had ever done—at least of erotica.

T: God, you two are so brave! I don’t know if I could stand up in front of a room full of people and read out my very filthy words!

J: I think it worked out because we both have theatre backgrounds. Also, we were in the Good Vibrations Vibrator Museum, so it was inspiring.

M: Ha! Yes, it was. Plus, the audience was friendly, so it was easy to jump in.

T: So tell me, what was the filthiest sentence you had to read out in front of all the strangers?

M: I read “Hard Knocks,” which is all about coming from being spanked, so the whole thing was pretty filthy. That said, “More blows slapping my sensitive, soaking cunt” might win.

T: *Sniggers.*

J: See, this is a hard question (pun intended) only because my filth gauge is a little questionable. In my story, “The Flogger,” a woman discovers her prim and proper boyfriend has found her dusty old flogger in the closet. Still, I think for me it was “cupped her slit with her whole hand.” I get a total visual every time I read it.

T: Like I thought—totally embarrassing! So pleased I don’t live near enough to have been roped in on that! But back to how we all met…

M: Tamsin—I know we met through Jade, but I’m trying to work out how we started emailing like maniacs…

T: I probably found you through stalking Jade’s twitter feed!

J: Ha! I remember telling you, Malin, that she was adorable and delightful, so that might have been part of it. Tamsin’s a hoot. (Hear that everyone? A damn hoot!)

T: Don’t scare the readers, Jade!

M: I adore that you just said “hoot.” And yes! I remember that. I had a question about something, so I emailed Tamsin, and she was lovely enough to help me out. Then we started chatting and off we went.

Picture of sexy woman writing in lingerie

This is so NOT how it works. Unless we’re dreaming…

J: I swear, it’s like destiny. *Clap of thunder.* *Parting clouds.* *Gentle rain ensues.*

T: Okay, moving swiftly on…

J: Yes, sorry. (Malin and I always get so damn gushy.) Let’s tell our readers a little more about Pillow Talk Secrets. What’s our goal?

M: I’d say to give readers a peek into a real friendship between real writers. Plus, sometimes people have interesting ideas about what erotica writers are like. I mean yes, we talk about sex.. kind of a lot. But we’re very well-rounded people, even discounting the filthy minds 😉

T: There are misconceptions about erotica writers, too—and we want to blast them out of the water. For example we don’t sit around writing in lacy lingerie sets. Well, I don’t. I can’t vouch for you two!

Proposed black and white image of Malin James

Malin James, tea and glasses in action!

M: I’m more of a tea and glasses kind of girl…and yoga pants. Yoga pants are good.

J: Ditto.

T: You wouldn’t catch me dead in yoga pants!

J: Silly. I’m sure you look smashing in yoga pants.

T: But exercise clothes are for exercise! I like to sit at my desk in a smart pin-stripe suit!

M: Hmm. I need more power lunches. Possibly with martinis….

T: See, there’s the difference between us—I’m uptight London and you’re cool California girls.

M: And yet, we work so well together!

T: Hats off to that!

J: Oh nelly. I think our readers are in for a treat with the three of us—a bunch of goofs, I tell you. So…let’s tell them more about what we’ll cover. For example, we’ll be doing this piece—Pillow Talk Secrets—about once every six weeks, right?

M: Exactly. And each Secrets session will be a little different. Sometimes we’ll talk about kissing (in fiction, of course), or strap-ons (in fiction, of course)…

J: *Snort.* We’ll also be laughing a lot, clearly. 😉 But strap-ons are such a great topic.

T: Actually, I just wrote a story about a strap on…

J: Yeah you did. It was smokin’.

M: That’s why strap-ons were on my mind. Ahem…

A sexy business woman representative of Tamsin Flowers

The power-lunching and classy Tamsin Flowers

J: We’ll also be talking about other erotica topics: limb arrangement, orgasms, couplings…

M: Pronouns! That’s a thing with threesomes…

J: We’ll have excerpts sometimes, too.

T: Maybe discuss books that we’re reading… And guests. What about the guests?

J: Yes! Definitely guests. Maybe even some competitions and prizes.

M: We’ll also talk about our works in progress or other exciting things that are happening to one or two or all of us.

J: For sure.

T: But as today’s our first time (we’re virgins?), the obvious topic is beginnings…. So how did you two get started as erotica writers?

J: Malin, you first.

M: Well, the short version is that I’ve been writing pretty seriously for about ten years, but I only started focusing on erotica about two years ago. Before that, I wrote the occasional bit of erotica, but only for myself. Then I stumbled over some open submission calls and started submitting to anthologies. Pieces started getting accepted, and suddenly, I was writing a lot more erotica.

T: Thank goodness!

M: After The Big Book of Orgasms reading, (where Jade and I met), I went to erotica full-time, and I’m happier as a writer than I’ve ever been.

J: Funny you mention “happier as a writer than [you’ve] ever been”—that’s exactly where I’m at, now. I started in spec fic (which I still love) and occasionally wrote erotica, but I didn’t know what to do with it. I ended up at a Fantasy/Sci-Fi writing conference having submitted a piece for a critique workshop. The readers flashed me raised eyebrows, and the workshop leader said, “Do you realize you’ve written a piece about a stripper werewolf?”

M: Did you realize you’d written about a stripper werewolf?

J: Honestly, it hadn’t dawned on me until he said it, and the group pointed out I had a flair for titillation…and suddenly, I’d found what really drew me! What about you, Tamsin?

T: I was dabbling in fiction, not too successfully, when I stumbled across a submission call for erotic short stories. So I thought to myself—yeah, I could do that. Despite the fact I hadn’t actually read any erotica at that point.

J: Whoa. Really?

T: Sure—I had read nothing! So I read one free short story, just to check how saucy I needed to be, and then I wrote one and sent it off. And…it got accepted—I couldn’t believe it. I still can’t because it was a really weird story, set in a dentist’s surgery…. Very strange. But I haven’t stopped since! And I’ve read a few more stories since then!

M: Your dentist story sounds great by the way. I love weird.

J: Me too. Spec fic background!

T: I wouldn’t say it was weird-good—just plain strange. A girl with dental phobia gets fingered by the nurse to make her forget she’s having a filling. It really made me feel squeamish about going to the dentist for quite a time!

M: Tamsin, you just cracked me up. I’d love to read it.

J: Me too!

T: Ha—one day I’ll send it to you both and you can see what I mean.

M: For what it’s worth, the first erotic story I ever sold had absolutely no sex in it. Lots of kissing (and it was hot kissing), but no sex. Go figure.

J: Well, I just have to say, I’m so glad we all made it to erotica—and of course, into each others’ orbs.

T: So am I—I’m having a blast with you two!

M: Likewise! Cheers to erotica and the people who read it!

J: Hear hear! Speaking of our readers, we should tell them about the newsletter.

T: Yes. Once a month we’ll be sending out a newsletter packed with all our latest updates—new releases, blog tours, details about forthcoming sessions and what we’ve been up to. Please sign up to make us feel popular.

J: Yes, please do! There’s a signup right here at http://pillowtalkwriters.com.

M: And you can also find us on Twitter and Facebook, as well. We’re everywhere. Everywhere! *Cue charmingly evil laughter.*

T: There’s simply no escaping us!

J: But we promise to make it a sweet experience.

M: Always…

T: You two sweet talkers!

J: Who, us? 😉 All right, I think that definitely gives our readers a good sense of what Pillow Talk is all about. Perhaps we should save more deliciousness for our newsletter?

T: You can sign up for the first edition now—and then it really gets going on 20th June…. Okay, I think it’s time to wind up proceedings.

M: I think so.

J: Agreed.

T: Hopefully we’ll see you at our next session—and please share your thoughts with us on Facebook and Twitter in the meantime.

M: Absolutely. We’d love to hear from you.

J: And thanks so much for joining us

XOXO,
Jade, Malin and Tamsin

Picture of a woman's hips in shadow, with thumbs hooked under her panties

Because I’m a Tease

Today I have all sorts of sexy news!

Well…kind of. Honestly, some of it is a lot of tease. Why?

You’ll see. 😉

Shadowed image of woman teasingly pulling panties off her hips

So, hmmm, where to start…First off, I have thrilling information I’ve been sitting on—I have a story in Rachel Kramer Bussel’s upcoming anthology Hungry for More! The book is all about female fantasies, and it’s sure to be hot, hot, hot!

While the cover reveal is yet to come and the release date is late this year, I do have a super sexy table of contents for you to preview. Look:

Introduction: Getting Explicit
Submissive Jacqueline Applebee
Happy Endings Giselle Renarde
Craig’s List Greta Christina
Bringing the Heat Tiffany Reisz
Madam Secretary Jaye Markham
Kitchen Slut Olivia Archer
Just Once Jocelyn Dex
Boat Rocking D.L. King
The Sleeper’s Beauty Jade A. Waters
Upstairs at the Ava DelovelyOlive
Organically Grown Brandy Fox
The Room Of Guarantees Jessica Lennox
Redrawing the Lines Bren Emile
Tickle Day Jeremy Edwards
Relief Katya Harris
Jailbait Torch Song Valerie Alexander
Red Lipstick Erzabet Bishop
Something Sleazy Elizabeth Coldwell
The Instructor Rose de Fer
My Pillarbox Red Cock Tilly Hunter
A First Time for Everything Rachel Kramer Bussel

What a hot lineup! I’m pretty excited about the story I have in this one, so I will pass on more news as soon as I have it…

This is actually the case with most of the news I have today: it’s all up my sleeve for just the right time, and all of it is so, so good. So for now, I’m going to have to play the tease. What I can tell you is that some of my news is almost-official, and more of it is official-official (aka, closer to reveal time). Like, for example, I mailed off contracts last week for three smoking hot anthologies, two of which will be my first time with an editor I adore—but I can’t tell you what the anthologies are yet. But soon. Soon!

I also have two crazy fantastic things coming down in about the next two months (hint: neither is an anthology, but both involve seriously awesome collaborations). I’m not sure on the date for one of them, but I can tell you that the other will happen right here on June 4th. Yes, June 4th! So go ahead, mark your calendars. I’ll wait. *Whistles.*

You’re back now? Good. I’m telling you, folks, this is going to be so fun! I hope you’ll enjoy it as much as I am. 🙂

Okay, so the essence of a good tease is to at least give a little something, which is why I have two pieces of news that are actually in effect now.

Here’s the first piece:

I signed up for Pinterest.

Oh my god. Oh my god. How does anyone have any self-control with this program? I can already tell you that there will be hours spent drooling over men I consider part of my mental harem (one day, it will be my real life harem, don’t you worry), as well as hours on inspiring quotes, nail polish, glam looks, sexy photos, and, and, and… But I suppose it was bound to happen. So if you’re able and interested, please find me on there. You can check out my pretties and I’ll check out yours. (Heh.) I’m still light on boards but I see all sorts of potential, including one I might just whip up with images that make me think of the two lovely characters from my work in progress. Keep your eyes open!

Speaking of my WIP, I’ve been quiet for a bit on that, but a status update is the second piece of news I wanted to share. The book is called The Assignment, and the great news is that my wonderful betas finished and passed along some exciting feedback. Yay! So, now I’m about to launch one last edit before I send it out into the world to find a home. Then what’s next? Well, I have a novella dying to be written (okay, more like three), and I have a couple ideas to jot down for a possible sequel to the WIP. But that’s later—brewing, but later. And then of course there are a bunch of other things to work on, but I guess that’s what we do here in the writing world: project after project. I love it! 🙂

All right, so that’s the news for today. Stay close for more reveals very soon!

XX,
Jade

 

 

Picture of panties around red shoes

Get Your Sexy Vote On!

Great news, everyone—Round Three of the Smut Marathon is up!

This round was quite a challenge for me, and I plan to tell you all about it soon. But in the meantime, please click on over to Alison Tyler’s place and vote for your favorite story…

The poll is open until Friday night.

Thanks for voting!

XX,
Jade

Banner photo of eyes beneath veil

Finished Edits, Good Friends, and Delicious News!

Well, the craziest thing happened on Friday: I finished editing my book.

I wish I could tell you it was that simple, but it wasn’t. It was more like this:

Image from The Gif Garden on Tumblr

Image from The Gif Garden on Tumblr

Weird, right?

To be completely honest, I didn’t feel finished. I’ve refined this editing process that some might call garden-variety OCD, but it works for me with short stories. Naturally, I thought I’d apply the method to a whole damn book. I mean, I outlined and wrote the thing in less than six weeks, so eight weeks of hardcore editing sounded completely reasonable.

The problem was that along the way, a few other life things had me at my stress max. Like, for example, a breakup. Oh and then the breakup, part two. There was also a tremendous amount of insomnia, and then for bonus kicks, my day job imploded. Fine, fine, no big deal. Next, I had pre-tendonitis in a thumb (what?), followed by pre-tendonitis in a finger on my opposite hand (spiffy). Then, my cat got sick and needed to be coned, which resulted in my two cats having to be separated for two weeks. (Note: cats body slamming and clawing at doors to get at one another may sound cute, but it’s not helpful for any sort of sleep factor. Or editing factor, for that matter.)

So cut to Friday, when I’m about to launch the “final” edit—and there it was: the final meltdown. I threw myself on the floor and kicked my feet in overwhelmed agony. There were even a few tears.

Luckily for me, Malin James came to my rescue. If you don’t know her, here’s a summary: she’s fucking fabulous. We had a seriously lovely phone call in which she talked me down for a good twenty minutes and reminded me that I was too close and probably too thorough, and I’d be editing again after my beta babes read it, so why not just send the manuscript on now?

SO I DID. I mean, when brilliance speaks, you listen.

After I let the book go, I felt like a mama bird pushing her baby chick out of the nest—maybe a little too early, but okay. I’m sure I looked something like this:

Oh my word. Is it done? Can we really call it done? Wahhhh...<br />  (Image from Gifs for the Masses on Tumblr) 

Oh my word. Is it done? Can we really call it done? Wahhhh…
(Image from Gifs for the Masses on Tumblr)

Still, the proverbial weight was off my shoulders and I proceeded to enjoy my weekend. I finished a few things. I relaxed. I slept for two nights in a row. Oh my god. I SLEPT, guys. It was great.

Less than a week later, I’m slightly less insane more calm. I’ve dived into a couple new projects while my novel is in my beta babes’ hands. Hurray! After that, I might even ponder a sequel… 🙂

In the meantime, I have exciting news about a couple other people!

First, Alison Tyler is writing a sequel to Those Girls. Did you read Those Girls? If not, you’d better. Stat!

Also, next week, something awesome is happening. Look:

How cool is that? I can’t wait!

Okay. I think I’m finally calm now. Phew! And on top of that, I finished a book.

Which means…time for me to celebrate and write more!

XX,
Jade

P.S. Special thanks to my beta babes, who not only eagerly took the manuscript off my hands, but gave me further cheerful pep talks. Yeah, you know who you are. 😉

Picture of woman wearing pink panties, focused on her hips

My Poem “Pink” is at The Erotic Woman!

Picture of woman wearing pink panties, focused on her hips

I’m so excited to let you know that The Erotic Woman is featuring another of my poems: “Pink”!

The Erotic Woman is a free site filled with sexy reads and images (NSFW!). Previously, they’ve hosted my short story “Marm” as well as my first ever public erotic poem, “Power.”

Now, I’m delighted to share another poem with you! It’s free and racy. 😉 So…please click on over to read “Pink.”

I hope you enjoy it!

XX,
Jade

 

Picture of panties around red shoes

Vote, Vote, Vote…

Just a quickie to let you know that Round 2 of Alison Tyler’s Smut Marathon 2014 is up!

Once again, I have an entry in this Survivor-esque game of erotica writing challenges. We, the competitors, are subject to Ms. Tyler’s whims (aka assignments)…and then you, the lucky reader, get to vote!

As before, I can’t tell you which entry is mine—but I can bat my eyelashes and beg you to vote. Pretty please? With sugar and cherries on top?

Click right here to head on over to Ms. Tyler’s place and cast your vote! The entries are hot!

The poll is open until midnight on Sunday, and I’ll post results as soon as I know them.

Thanks for voting!

XX,
Jade

Black and white image of man kissing woman's chest

Poetic Naughtiness — “Power”

In my younger years, I wrote a lot of poetry. It started in elementary school, when apparently I wrote material so dark the principal kept calling my parents in to discuss my suicidal tendencies (sorry, mom). This random fact has always surprised me, since I’m an eternal optimist—as in, “Screw the glass half full, I have a glass!”—but it is what it is. Little me wrote deep, dark, angry poems.

In high school, I switched gears and began writing deep, dark, dramatic poems. Huge improvement, right? Suddenly, I was not only writing about blackening flowers and body-bruising windstorms but bemoaning the loss of various heart breaker boyfriends. I wrote poems multiple times a day, and in fact, I still have my tattered-page journals filled with heart-wrenching verse and doodles I couldn’t make sense of if I tried. But eventually, the urge wore off; I realized I preferred fiction to poetry…

With the exception of erotic poetry. This was my little secret—all those deep, dark emotions I used to channel had turned into something sexier, sultrier, more explicit. Occasionally, I passed a piece on to a lucky boyfriend. Mostly, I kept it on my hard drive just for me.

That is, until today.Black and white image of man kissing woman's neck

You may remember The Erotic Woman, the lovely site that featured my story “Marm” a couple weeks back? Well, they have a fondness for erotic poetry, too, and now, I’m delighted to debut my first public erotic poem! So…please hop on over and take a peek at “Power.” Oh, and an advisory: The Erotic Woman does include some NSFW images, so be prepared to read and enjoy the view. 😉

As for “Power”—I hope you enjoy it!

XX,
Jade

Sweaty male torso held from behind

“Heat” Over at Oleander Plume’s!

Today is the second part of the triple smut fest!

Which means…I am actually over at Oleander Plume’s site today. She is a fellow contributor in Best Women’s Erotica 2014, and today she’s asked me to come on over and write a flash story. In fact, she offered me a challenge—dun dun DUN!—which I gladly accepted. Her response to the challenge is coming on Wednesday, but in the meantime, please hop on over to her site to read “Heat”!

More on what inspired the story and the challenge is posted there too, but to give you a little preview, I’ll leave you with this:

Picture of woman's hands wrapped around a sweaty man's stomach.

Now, please go read “Heat” at Oleander Plume’s. Hope you enjoy it!

XX,
Jade

Neon sign of XXX

Triple the Smut

Okay, maybe it’s residual love from Valentine’s Day, or maybe it’s just a smutty kind of week, but I feel like sharing triple the smut.

Neon XXX sign

What does this mean, you ask? Well, starting today, I have three smutty pieces of goodness for you.

Today, I’m delighted to tell you about Alison Tyler’s Smut Marathon 2014. Ms. Tyler has run this game a few times, and this year, I’m thrilled to be a contestant! It’s basically Survivor for Erotica Writers—as in, Ms. Tyler issues a challenge and posts our (anonymous) responses, and YOU (yes, YOU, right there!) get to vote. How fun is that?

So, what I’d love for you to do is hop right over to Ms. Tyler’s site. You can read about all 15 of the contestants, and of course, read and vote on Round 1! While I can’t tell you which entry is mine, I can tell you I’m there and that I’d love for you to vote. There’s no way of knowing how long I’ll last, but I’m seriously excited to be playing.

Voting closes Thursday at midnight, so be sure to visit her site asap.

Now, what’s the smut for the rest of the week?

Oleander Plume—another contestant in the Smut Marathon, and also another author I’m happy to share pages with in Best Women’s Erotica 2014—is going to not only be hosting me on her site, but visiting here as well! Both stops have a special free hot story for you, so stay close for those posts. It’s going to be a smutty good time!

That’s all for now, so in the meantime, be sure to check out the Smut Marathon 2014 and vote. I’ve read all the lines and they’re sexy. And yes, I voted.

Won’t you? 🙂

XX,
Jade